September 9, 2026, 3:46 pm | Read time: 5 minutes
“Use it or lose it”–meaning “use it or it disappears”–applies to muscles, among other things. And in a figurative sense, does it also apply to genitals? FITBOOK author Laura Pomer asked an expert whether and, if so, how the female body changes when it hasn’t been sexually active for a long time.
Follow the FITBOOK channel on WhatsApp now!
Starting Sex After a Long Break Can Be a Bit “Bumpy”
When women haven’t had sex for a while, it can be a bit bumpy when it happens again, says Dr. Doris Maria Gruber. Besides the emotional aspect, physical reactions also need to readjust to a sexual partner. During stimulation, it might take longer, and the woman may not become as quickly lubricated, the gynecologist explains to FITBOOK. If things get “tight,” sex can logically be painful. However, this lost “appetite” can be rekindled, according to the expert: “It comes with being in love and with an interested and interesting partner.” A desire to have children can also–especially for women–increase libido.
What Does It Mean for a Woman to Have “No Sex” for a Long Time?
Fortunately, this is entirely individual. For some, a week without sex feels endless. Others can go months or even years without “physicality” without issue. After all, there are lifestyles that completely forgo sexual physicality.
Can You Get Out of the Habit of Sex?
Perhaps that’s not the best way to put it. However, desire does decrease when women (and men!) have been abstinent for a long time–out of sight, out of mind. It’s reminiscent of the stomach, which eventually shrinks if it receives very little food over a long period. Some people suffer from this–for others, it even feels healthy.
And the fact that libido decreases is a normal physical reaction to a “dry spell” and is essentially a good thing. If it were otherwise, it would cause significant distress for those affected. Libido usually returns suddenly when Cupid’s arrow strikes.
Also interesting: Why women should masturbate more often
Can “Vagina Depression” Occur When a Woman Hasn’t Had Sex for a Long Time?
Various media warn of “vagina depression”–also called “vaginal atrophy.” The female genitalia are said to atrophy (shrink) if not used for sexual purposes for a long time. Due to the lack of stimulation, the vaginal walls are said to have poorer blood circulation, which could permanently affect their elasticity. It sounds dramatic–and can indeed happen, confirms Prof. Gruber–but very rarely in young women. In menopause, however, this is a serious issue and is related to hormones.
The Vagina May Produce Less Secretion
The explanation has little to do with sex: During menopause, less of the female sex hormone estrogen is produced, resulting in (among other things) less vaginal secretion, which is important for the collagen fibers and thus the connective tissue of the vaginal wall. Vaginal mucosal atrophy is indeed a problem at a certain age, which women can–and should–address with creams! But: “The young vagina produces secretion,” Gruber tells FITBOOK–”with or without sex.” The production of vaginal secretion also depends on the menstrual cycle. If vaginal atrophy occurs at a young age, it has pathological causes and should be investigated, according to the gynecologist.
The First Sex After a While–What Women Should Pay Attention To
Since the mucous membranes may be less lubricated during the first act after a long break, minor injuries can easily occur. Therefore, according to Prof. Gruber, infection protection is particularly important after abstinence. “You should also listen to your gut,” the doctor adds, “meaning whether it feels right to take advantage of every ‘opportunity’ sexually.”
Why Women Shouldn’t Settle for This Intimate Problem
How Menopause Changes the Vagina
Why Sex Is Healthy
There are a few reasons not to let sex breaks become too long. However–we want to emphasize here–the joy and desire for intimacy with partners or oneself should naturally be the main reasons.
Furthermore, sex is proven to be good for health. A 2016 study found that sex seems to protect women from cardiovascular risk later in life.1 A 2020 study even concluded that sexually active women are more likely to experience menopause later in life than less sexually active women. (FITBOOK reported).2 Additionally, the libido, immune system, blood pressure, and sleep benefit from a sexually active love life. It also reduces the perception of stress–both physically and mentally. Furthermore, sex can boost self-confidence, strengthen the bond with a partner, and reduce anxiety disorders and depression.3
Study: Regular Sex Can Increase Women’s Life Expectancy
The connection between sexual activity, depression, and cardiovascular health is also addressed in a study published in June 2024. It examined the link between sexual activity and life expectancy in women and men. According to the study, regular sexual activity is associated with a lower risk of death–and thus a higher life expectancy. Factors such as improved cardiovascular health, reduced stress, and stronger immune function are cited as reasons for this. Women with low sexual activity showed increased mortality (the difference was not significant for men). The mortality rate was particularly high among women who suffered from depression. The study was published in the “Journal of Psychosexual Health.”4
Conclusion
The idea that the vagina completely dries up and “shrinks” is, of course, nonsense. In a broader sense, “use it or lose it” does apply: Sex loses importance and presence, you get out of practice, and rust a bit–it’s not dramatically unhealthy, but definitely unfortunate. Moreover, the body and mind miss out on the previously mentioned health benefits of sex.